My essay feedback was really helpful. The content is okay, there could be more triangulation and more explicit links between different points that connect. Also needs a bit of re-structuring and re-arranging and obviously the rest needs to be written up from note form. Jamie also mentioned three key points that I'd spoken about so far- reduction, organisation and visual metaphor and thinks I should expand on these processes rather than writing small amounts about lots of different topics. This way I can talk about these in depth.
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